BIG BAND NAMES

BIG BAND NAMES

DEWEY NEEDHAM AND HIS JAZZ ORCHESTRA

TRUMPETS
Al Tissimo (scream trumpet)
Pops de Vane (old time 1st trumpet)
Pearce Eardrum
Keane Payne
Plenty Haitönen (1st trumpet Finland)
Willy Makit or Kenny Makit (1st trumpet - & wife Betty Wont)
Buster Bloodvessel (1st trumpet)
Felix Cited
Howie Spitz
Ames Toulouse
Chops O'Gonagen (or Lips O' Gonagen)
Ed Down
Rusty Piston
Buster Hinote
Diz Astor
Noah Count

TROMBONES
Hi Register
Slip Shod
Willie Show
Bjent Slide
Adolf Tune
Slide Rule
Mosley Late
Scott Noslide (on valve trombone)
Terry Billnoise
Slip Horner
Moe Zaic
Justin Tune
Latent Pist (Swedish)
Lew Slips (bass trombone)
Keith Myath (toothless bass trombone)
Tom Bone

SAXOPHONES
Kenny Read - lead alto
Izzy Sharp - lead alto
Pearl Keys (female lead alto)
Mosley Flat - 2nd alto
Les Tone - 2nd alto
Manny Notes - 1st tenor
Mai-Lik - Chinese 1st tenor
Reed Mylips - 1st tenor
Otto Tune - 2nd tenor
Ron Key - 2nd tenor
Lee King - 2nd tenor
Olaf Awhiskey - Swedish tenor
Mustafa Fix - Arabic tenor
Selmer Horn - broke tenor player
Seymour Butts - baritone
Rusty Keys - baritone
Arthur Chorus - baritone
Ima Growler - baritone

FLUTE
Bret Support - Will Trill - Mosley Sharpe - Lotta Air - Vera Piercing (piccolo)

TUBA
Dick Hertz - Sue Saphone

FRENCH HORN

Zero Terry Valve - Belle Tone

ALPEN HORN

Switzer Land

RHYTHM SECTION

PIANO
R. Peggio - Manny Wong Kordz - Phil Allgaps - Hugo Tommy Head (piano bar) - Sven Lightsarlo (Swedish piano bar) - Thelonious Gallintown (gay pianist)

ORGAN
Page Turner

BASS
Ron Lines - Pete Ziccato (Italian) - Toulouse De Beat (French) - Buster Gutt - Warren Fretts - Uguludunga (African) - Dieter Gee (Ian's brother - see below) - Stan Dupp - Simi Lowe - Sleepy Walker

GUITAR
Ron Kords - Rex Yurears (rock guitarist) - Ian Gee & Rudy Mentry (folk guitarists) - Kent Reed - Segovia Carpet (classical guitarist) - Django Bells - Rock Enrol - Sten Gunn (Swedish rock guitarist)
- Ivan Slipisliksin (Russian BeBop guitarist) - Blues Lee (Chinese blues guitarist)

DRUMS
Phil Dinn - Don Swing - No-Tai-Ming (Vietnamese) - Owen Transport (Welsh) - Will Travel - Arturo Versees - Knut Loose (Danish) - Ching Boom (Chinese) - I.Q. Lowe - Pres Rohl - Willie Rushmore - Chick Chickering

VIBES
Hal Mallet

BANJO
Ricky Tick

HARP
Anne Dante

HARPSICHORD
Arron Variation

ORGAN
Hammond Orgone

PERCUSSION
Perry Diddle - Jim Nasium - Tim Bales

STRING SECTION
Adolf Fiddler - Phil Harmonic (1st Violin) - Fay Kerr (2nd violin) - Vi Baratto - Vera Sharp (violas) - Beau Braker (Cello) - Aaron De Djeestryng

DANCERS
Dinah Sore - Betty Whont - Sonia Papermoon - Sharon Sharalijk - Lois D. Nominator - Barbara Seville - Tamara Nevercomes - Tamara Zanutha Day - Anne Fetamin - Anna Rexia - Tap Bottoms - Tutu Divine

CHOREOGRAPHY
Amanda B. Reckonwith - Ben Dover (gay) - Dan Sing (Asian) - Jacques Strahp

DANCE TEAMS
Ko & Nova Caine - Sam & Janet Evening - Monica Zakerminov (Russian)

FEMALE SINGERS
Norma Stitts (or E. Norma Stitts) - Eileen Back - Eileen Dover - Annie Keewildoo - Sheila Blige (or Sheila O'Blige) - Marsha Dymes - Lotta Head - Terri Belle (French) - Kay Sirah-Sirah (Anglo/Egyptian)
Deborah C. Ewe (singer with adenoid problem) - Mozarella Fitzgerald (Italian jazz singer) - Carmen Gettit (Spanish) - Vera Bedworthy - Ava Banana (South American)

FEMALE BLUES SINGERS
Bertha De Blues - Elefants Gerald

FEMALE DUO
Annie Tune 'n' Annie Key

MALE SINGERS
Amos B.Haven - Denny Nodsout - Lee Thargic - Amos Havacik Daly (Jewish,Slovak,Irishman) - Chester Gigolo - Payne N. Diaz - Kanta Singh (Indian) - Barry Tone - Beau Bells

COUNTRY & WESTERN SINGERS
Lars Roundup (Swedish) - Abner Selfabal

BACKING VOCALS
Rachel Prejudice - Freda Slaves - Sybil Rights (South African trio) - Anita Leigh - Eustace Crew - Ike and Turner Corner

SINGING COACH
Hal E. Tosis - Iona Ferrari

ARRANGER
Walt Smedley

BAND LEADERS / CONDUCTORS
Dewey Needham - Ron Tempo - Ivor Wiggon - Walter Mess - Charles Louis D'Inse (French) - Voorhees A. Jollygoodfellow - Owen De Guys (and his wife Leigh De Guys) - Yuron Yurown (Israeli) - Seldon Wright - Kent Count - Ofun Wong (Chinese) - Kick der Raas (Dutch) - Count Immov - Izzy Goudinov - Phil Harmonic (classical) - Dick Dolittle - Hans Zupp

MASTER OF CEREMONIES
Darryl B. Moreticome - Jertzy Bounce (Polish)

BAND COMMEDIAN
Lucius N. Savuma

SOUND CREW
Lew Swires - Mike Rafone - Mustafa Djoint - Mike Fawlty - Elco Short - Anna Log - Lotta Elco

LIGHTING
Justin Case - Flip M. Awn - Jerry Rigg

ELECTRICIAN
Les Voltage

CAMERA
Will Shutter

BAND BOY
Noah I. Cue

SECURITY
B. A. Dick - Rick O'Shae - Ian Security

LIBRARIAN
Miss Inga Page

COPYIST
L. Egible

ROADIES
Oliver Beer (English) - Mannheim Stoned (German) - Manuel Lehba (Spanish) - Ram Shackle (Indian), Fu Kiu (Chinese) - Wang Kerr - Tucker Inn - Humphrey Cases - Leonard Beerstein - Largo Factotum - Park Benchley

STAGE MANAGER
Lew Scannon - Stan By

BUS DRIVER
Ben Z. Dreen - Oliver de Rode

TOUR COORDINATORS
Alice Verboten (German - discipline)
Ate De Jong (Dutch - child care)
Walter Wohlcarpitz (accomodation)

UNION REPRESENTATIVE
Morey Ziduals - Scott Free - Fairleigh Honest

PATRONS (OR SPONSORS)
Baron Wasteland - Lord Elpuss

MANAGEMENT CONSULTANT
Bacchus Stabber

BOOKING AGENTS
Al Fresco (Outdoor Festivals) - Gig Booker - Willy Paye - Rip Orff

MANAGERS
Robin Bastard - Anthony Bluitt

PUBLICITY & PR
Igg Norriss - Ed Vertise - Mai Ling (China) - Jess Fine

FAN CLUB PRESIDENT
Doug de Ban

TALENT SCOUT
Hiram Cheap

BAND LAWYERS
Dewey, Cheatham, & Howe - Art Schmartz - Shuster Sheisster

WARDROBE
Zip Herrup - I. B. Sewinn

CATERERS
Andy Pasta - Harry Vederci - Laika McAroni - Sal Monella - Art Burne - Mo Zarella - Al Dente

ACCOUNTANT
Iris Audit - Sawyer Cockoff

BAND CHAPLAIN
Theo Log (Dutch) - C. de Light - Hal L. Ujah - Patience Hopefully (female pastor)

BAND POSTMAN
Zip Cody

BAND DOCTOR

Lancelot Carver

CRITIC
Pandit Mersey-Leslie

Q-Metal Replacement Bridge Pins- Depleted Uranium (DU) Bridge pins increase sustain!

Many people change out their bridge pins over time in effort to find their individual tone. Couple that quest to increase string sustain, string life, and greater volume one can easily understand that epic TONE is an elusive and often misunderstood phenomenon. TUSQ is one of the factory favorites because of its availability, cost, and consistent tone. Other materials used include brass, fossilized bone, tusk, and simple plastic.

However, now with the aid of technology we can now buy depleted uranium bridge pins. Q-Pins as they are called offer superior tone because they are heavier than brass and lead pins. In addition, they glow in the dark and therefore you will stand out on the stage - Want to get noticed for your playing? Well, why not be noticed for your choice of equipment! Show your superior knowledge of showmanship, catch the eye of that wall flower in the hundredth row. Yes, indeed these pins are also available as string pins and projectiles. These babies pack a punch and will drop a Bull Elephant at 30 paces. With this string anchor and defense mechanism you can virtually lay off your security department and save overhead.

Heavy - Q-metal P-Pin is the projectile version of this product. With a density of 19.1cm/3 these pins are 68.4% denser than lead and have a half life of 4.468 billion years. You are buying these pins not only as a tone investment but a inheritance.

Some worry about Q-Pins carcinogenic long term effect on humans - Poppy cock! The WHO stated, "In aggregate then human epidemiological evidence is consistent with in risk of birth defects in offspring of persons exposed to DU." Yeah, they also wrote, "Multiple studies using cultured cells and laboratory rodents suggest the possibility of leukemogenic, genetic, reproductive, and neurological effect from chronic exposure." In actuality, these pins are no more dangerous than a visit to the Grand Canyon during the rainy season.

These pins are becoming easier to find and will be available soon in a store near you!

Gary Moore RIP

Gary Moore passed away this past weekend while on holiday in Spain. As usual, mainstream media is greedy and there were unsubstantiated reports speculating on unnatural cause of death.

Gary had a heart attack and for many, the first one is the last one.

A emotional player who never failed to inspire us all to play well - to the best of our capabilities!

We miss you Gary but you are jamming with the best. Say hello to Les for us all!

Gary Moore's web page click here